i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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