dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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