Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
