So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I have post one night stand depression
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize