I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
