I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
You're like the curious george of whores
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
