We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
