I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
