I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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