Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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