DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
