remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
