What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
