fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
