Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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