Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
