Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
This is my gift to your gina
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
