I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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