I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize
