i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
