My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
