You can't motorboat a personality
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
