How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
