It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
