i would punch a child for taco bell
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
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