So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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