Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize