Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
