It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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