You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
