i just google imaged poop.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
he's gonorrhea incarnate
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
