Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
