The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
mondays should just be called national damage control day
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
