Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
