I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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