We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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