Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
