you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I pour the whiskey from now on
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
