once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
