Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
