she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
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