why didn't you poke me back
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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