i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
