haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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