Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
