It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
