My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
