Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
