Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
