Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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