So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
